I’ve Never Been So Hot…And Not In A Good Way

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Yes this is real, and I took it.  Right before I burst into flames.

Yes this is real, and I took it. Right before I burst into flames.

So, the only thing worse than surviving a week-long, record breaking heatwave in Phoenix…is having your air conditioning die right in the middle of it.  Four days and three repairmen later…we’re finally back in our house.

Me: I’m no longer a vagrant!

Ryan: Yea!  Did you lower the thermostat to 72, just because you can?

Me: The house is finally down to 84, I’m trying not to push it too fast.

Ryan: I had a brand new unit go out once, and the house got up to 95.  The cats weren’t happy.

Me: I’m guessing because the fur?

Ryan: I tried to get them wet, but they didn’t like it.

Me: I’m gonna go ahead and let you reread that last sentence to yourself.

And This Is Why You Never Leave My Son Alone With Popsicle Sticks And Duct Tape

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Me: “What are you doing?”

Xavier: “Making a teeny tiny crossbow.”

Me: (pause) “What is this crossbow going to shoot?”

(silence)

Me: “Are you pausing because you’re still trying to figure that part out, or because you’re trying to think of an answer that won’t piss me off?”

(silence)

Me: “Throw it away.”

 

UPDATE: This thing is operational.  Zombie apocalypse…BRING IT.

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