Meanwhile, Men Everywhere Are Just Hoping For Red Meat And A Blowjob

Standard

Ryan: “If you could get anything you wanted for Valentine’s Day, what would you want?”

Me: “I’d want for Jon Stewart to take back his resignation and promise to stay on the Daily Show until the end of time.”

Ryan: (Blank stare.)

Me: (Raised eyebrow.)

Ryan: “Anything else?”

Me: “A unicorn.”

Ryan: “Soooo…tulips and chocolates it is!”

 

32 thoughts on “Meanwhile, Men Everywhere Are Just Hoping For Red Meat And A Blowjob

  1. I think Men might forsake Steak and a BJ day for the purpose of reinstating Jon Stewart.

    So sad. Jon Stewart broke my single gal’s heart right before V-day. Even chocolate can’t make this any better.

    • Amen sister. I was completely bereft The day the news broke, Ryan called me with, “Have…have you heard?” I feel like we should have hightailed it to mass to light candles. 😦

  2. Randstein

    Gosh! I go away for a little while and things have really changed. Ryan is very quick on his feet. I would have wasted half a day looking for the right unicorn.

  3. Doug in Oakland

    It doesn’t have to be RED meat, white meat is good too…
    Jon is one of my heroes. It seems to me that he’s been toying with the idea of his departure for a while now. At least he trained some capable people (like John Oliver) to sort of do his job sfter he leaves.

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