Remember When I Got To Teach Reading? Those Were The Days…

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So…my friend D’Avonte was wearing a black mini-dress with lace tights and stilettos, because…it was a Tuesday.

Me: “Dee, if you’re going to wear a short skirt, you’ve got to sit lady-like…knees together, sister…knees together.”

D’Avonte: (laughing) “What’d you see!?  What’d you see!?”

Me: “I saw a flash of white, which given your outfit and your skin color seems unusual, so let’s, please, keep it classy.”

D’Avonte: (throwing hands to the sky) “Jesus, help me!”

Me: “We can all use all the help we can get today, apparently.”

D’Avonte: “True.  You know, Miss M…Jesus IS everywhere.”

Me: “Awesome, so he can see what I can…think about that when you’re sitting.”

D’Avonte: (theatrically crossing legs)

Me: “Thank you.”

D’Avonte: (gesturing to crotch) “I don’t need Jesus all up in there.”

Me: (facepalm)

 

37 thoughts on “Remember When I Got To Teach Reading? Those Were The Days…

  1. You go above the call of duty. You are commended for your courage in addressing public decency, teaching modesty, and especially mentioning religion in a public school. Perhaps you’ve spared a nun and Ms D. some shearing memory in the future (although clearly too late to save yourself). It’s those little lessons that have big impacts.

  2. Jesus Christ, God in Heaven, hallowed be thy name… ah the crotch humour. I’m strangely feeling aroused and pious all at the same time, and that’s just confusing despite the several glasses of scotch… so, is this what kids call a party these days?

  3. I AM SO DEAD RIGHT NOW!!!

    But D’Avonte is all kinds of right. If Mary Magdalene thought the same way, and didn’t want Jesus all up in there, we wouldn’t have so many rumors swirling about their relationship as we do today…

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