Every week, when I pick my daughter up from a class downtown, there are lots of homeless in the area, so, tonight, I bought a bag of burgers to give to someone.
Me: “We’ve been driving around for 30 minutes…and we’ve seen no one. Where is everybody?”
Caolinn: “Maybe they’ve solved the homeless problem since last week.”
Me: “Doubtful…our state is too busy oppressing the gays.”
Caolinn: “Well, how about that guy?”
Me: “Um…no, he’s coming out of Urban Bean…he’s not homeless, he’s a hipster. It’s hard to tell them apart sometimes, but a $5 cup of coffee suggests that you have a home to go to.”
Caolinn: “Maybe, when we do finally find someone, it will really be someone magical in disguise, and they’ll reward us for our kindness.”
Me: “What, like a friggin’ genie? Do you think that we’re getting wishes, here? We’re trying to be nice and FAILING at it.”
Caolinn: “Not a genie…maybe like Jesus, and he’ll let us go straight to heaven like Mary without really dying.”
Me: “Um…that’s nice, but I have unfinished business here on Earth.”
Caolinn: “Fine, maybe not heaven…maybe he’ll just make us immortal.”
Me: “Let me get this straight…you think that in order to reward us for a bag of McDoubles…Jesus is going to turn us into vampires.”
Caolinn: “Well, it’d be cool.”
Me: “We need to go back to church.”
Entertaining and educating us at the same time… I love it Megan! And I may just have a new favourite picture too.
Sean, in honour of you, I will be deliberately using the proper “ou” spelling of words today. Truth be told, I’ll also be doing it to piss people off. 🙂
Where are all the homeless people when you need them? Selfish fuckers…
I deliberately left out the part where she contemplated that they were all at the same party. *sigh*
omg. so hilarious. that would be the worst party ever.
Or the best…there’s no in between on this one.
Well, there is that Biblical precedent for people coming back form the dead….
This is true. The bible is rife with zombies.